Radical Self-Care


Blessings BE~LOVED Ones. Please be forewarned that as I type today’s message I AM delaying my personal gratification by fighting the urge to run outside and play! It’s bright and sunny outside and for that I AM very grateful. In fact, yesterday I went running along the beautiful homes and mansions which adorn the waterfront overlooking the Long Island Sound. I was so energized by being outdoors, listening to the sounds of nature and breathing in the tasty moist air near the ocean that I AM ready for more and more and more! I was yet again reminded of the importance of self-care… feeding and nurturing me in myriad ways so that I AM able to be full to overflowing with L.O.V.E. (Light Opulence Victory Eternal) and to serve as a messenger of G.O.D. (Good Opulent Design). Because I was almost in another state and under unnecessary stress instead of enjoying this entire Friday as MYDay!

As a minister, mental health professional and a woman of color, I have had to overcome numerous beliefs about martyrdom. Girls and women are often indoctrinated into believing that their primary purpose is to take care of others at whatever cost to self.  Souls who have been raised in many of the popular spiritual and religious traditions may have learned that to suffer for God or in service to God is “good.”  As a mental health professional my exposure to trauma, hardships, abuse, neglect and suffering is considerable. Add to the mix the long history of bondage, slavery, oppression, racism, etc. that accompanies someone born into an ethnicity of color and you can understand that I  sit at the crossroads of where womanhood, race, mental health and ministry meet. It’s inescapable.

Sure this path offers an abundance of opportunities to grow through S.H.I.T. unique to a woman of color, in ministry, in the business of healing. And I actually love it! At the very least I love the intricacies of my path as a female minister and mental health professional of color because my understanding about the necessity for radical self-care is constantly growing. I believe that this growth helps me, my clients, my readers and everyone exposed to Healing Truth Center activities. I suspect that if you commit to Radical Self-Care, too, you’ll always be full to overflowing with L.O.V.E. and be able to show up each day as your absolute best and blessed. You can live your mission without “needing to get away” and rise victoriously over whatever stressful circumstances appear on your path.

Until and unless you take REAL good care of yourself, ALL of the time, you still have some work to do on the self-care tip! This is a good thing y’all. We’ve got our entire lives to get better at it, each and every day. I, too, am a work in progress on the path of Radical Self-Care.  So here are my Top 5 Radical Self-Care Tips.

1.  At the very least, start EVERY day with a prayer.
By the way, on the self-care tip anxious prayers do not count because they simply do not serve to uplift, empower nor inspire you. Yes, I am being a hard ass about this but starting your day in fear and praying in fear is WHACK! The point of prayer is at-one-ment with G.O.D.  What lifts us up to G.O.D. are thoughts/prayers that remind US as to how absolutely amazing, powerful and wise G.O.D. is, how we cannot escape the Good that G.O.D. has for us and how WE are G.O.D. in action! So if you are somehow feeling a little anxious or actually trembling in fear when you wake up in the morning… you can slap yourself back onto the G.O.D. page with some bold self-talk (and scream if you have to when you say this): STOP! GOD IS HERE! GOD IS WORKING!

2. Meditate DAILY!
Trust me when I tell you, meditation will change your life! When you develop the habit of sitting quietly, you allow all that is Good, Glorious and wonderful within you to come bursting forth. You can literally feel your energies shift. You can feel the Presence of Holy Spirit in, as, for, with and through you! You can hear the Voice of God. Knowing this, as my buddy Reverend Bobby often says, “Why would you NOT want to do the things necessary to be healthy and whole within yourself?” Nuff said. I have a series of videos about meditation playing at HealingTruthCenter.com to help you get started. Get crackin!

3. Develop an incredibly bold self-talk game!
You may very well HAVE to be your own BEST cheerleader. Never mind what ideas and designs other people may have for you. Never mind whether or not anyone ever validates you and lets you know how absolutely amazing you are in your own oh so very special way. In the morning, day, evening and whenever you feel like it, remind yourself that you are indeed absolutely amazing and incredible! You are indeed destined for greatness. God’s hand is upon you! You are blessed! Now tell yourself all about yourself, during every spare moment in your mind and out loud, too! I’ve taken to setting reminders in my cell phone from Prosperity NOW! It’s nice to get alerts that say “I believe in myself,” “I trust my success,” and “Every day in wonderful ways I heal, bless and prosper the world!”

4. Dedicate time and energy just for you! In the scriptures we read that we owe no one anything but love and to love our neighbors as our selves. Hmmm… this pretty much erases all that martyr nonsense. Because, if you are going to love your neighbor AS yourself, you’ve gotta love you first, real good and best. You set the standard for how you love your neighbors BY how you love you AND you get to model the standard for how all of your neighbors can love you, too. Besides, you don’t even owe anyone anything but love. And if someone has laid a guilt trip on you about what you would do if you “really” love them, I’m here to tell you that’s some BS right there. Now I’m not talking about neglecting your kids, partner, job, bills or any responsibilities that you may have. I AM talking about dedicating, with wisdom and balance, stuff that is just about loving and nurturing you. It could be committing to good nutrition, exercising regularly, reading time, going out, meeting up with friends, writing, performing, giving life to something you’ve dreamed about, taking regular vacations, investing in your education/skill development… the list goes on. In fact, let me know what kinds of things you are doing JUST for you.

5. Be open to receive a lot of Support!
We live in a Universe occupied with other people BECAUSE collectively we are better than we are individually. There is no need to go the path alone BE~LOVED Ones! Share your self with others, including your questions with others who are positive, loving and supportive. Notice how I qualified this one to specifically outline that the others with whom you share are loving and supportive? These are the souls you want in your circle. So be selective and thoughtful about who you share you with and do be open to receive love, support, nurturing, encouragement and a swift kick in the tail when ya need to get up, get out and do something! In your support circle can be friends, family, peers, mentors, psychotherapists, counselors, coaches… whomever is objective enough to see you in all of your radiant Divine Light and help you be your absolute best and blessed.

BONUS TIP: Have fun and laugh A LOT!
Humor heals. Laugh at your self! Laugh at both the trials and the victories, too! Don’t take yourself so seriously. Life can be joyful if you allow yourself to relax and appreciate the humor of it all. If you look for it, you’ll find the humor and enjoy the energy boost that comes with your laughter. I’ve also found that by the time I can laugh at a situation, I’m usually over it. Have fun BE~LOVED.  Catch a comedy set and live YOUR life with laughter!

Please post your tips, too, so we can support each other on the path. Well, I’m off to go play and then to the Romance and Finance event in the City tonight!

Are you inspired by this blog? Please support my efforts with a contribution to the Capital Campaign for Healing Truth Center today! Thank you!

With BOLD BLAZING HOT L.O.V.E. (Light Opulence Victory Eternal)


SHAWNA MARIE is a Spiritual Leader, psychotherapist and author. She hosts the Living in Spiritual Perspective Show at HealingTruthCenter.com and provides consultations to empower others to their greatest potential.

Copyright 2011. All rights reserved.


4 Responses to “Radical Self-Care”

  1. Rev. Bobby Says:

    You out did yourself.

  2. dawyn Says:

    Daily mediation is a must. It keeps us in tune with the God spirit that lives within all of us. Taking time to be with nature is a reminder to us that we are one with the earth. That its alive and part of us.
    You will be inspired by taking this time each day, and all answers you seek will be revealed to you.
    Peace and Blessings

    • SHAWNA MARIE Says:

      Amen BE~LOVED Dawyn! Well said! Start heading towards your phone… I’m calling you in 2 minutes. (Been meaning to call you for weeks and will do it NOW!)

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